Our Favorite Search Term Referrals: PART DEUX.

It’s that time again!  For those of you who are all like, “Where the frack was Part UN?” allow me to enlighten you:  WordPress has this cool feature called “search term referrals” that shows us what terms people search that lead them to our blog.  Like last time, it frightens us that a large percentage of people who find our blog may or may not have been looking for pediatric pornography.  Enjoy.

And, like last time, Bold text is a search term and non-bold text is witty retort courtesy of LHB, MRG, and JAF.  We’re still serious about this: MATURE READERS ONLY.

“meta carpenter” – I don’t know why Jesus would be meta, but he’s definitely the first thing I thought of when I read this.

mary boleyn the great prostitute – I’ll be honest, I think she was so-so.

kimbell art museum shit you – Whoa whoa whoa, as a Texan and the world’s biggest Louis Kahn fan, I would just like to say a big “Shit you” right back to the asshole who searched this term.

french person from the 1700 clip art – The only thing this person could do to be more better friends with us, would be to have typed the search term in comic sans.

post coital cigarette The hottest way to kill yourself.

john ruskin pubic hair – was ______.  (You fill in the blank.  It’s like a dirty mad lib.)

colin firth wearing a sweater – You know what MRG likes.

geena davis pirate nipples – You know what we all like.

orgy anal

bayeaux tapestry the pregnant bitch – I wonder if JAF knows what this person is referring to because I want to see that shit.

prince puffy sleeves men

regulars for shame true blood Yes, we at For Shame are regulars on True Blood, thank you for noticing!

gay victorian orgy

getting some good booty

who’s she?  i just want to love her.  tight jeans  – This person is a fucking poet.

are klondike bars bad for you – Nope.

goebbels sexual appetite – Big and bigoted.

when do i get to be emperor + son fucks mom – Soon + you’re a sicko.  How’s that for an answer?

evelyn nesbit hot bitch

king henry the viii was a fucking idiot – Listen, tit-head, why don’t you shut the fuck up and read a fucking book because H.8 was anything but an idiot, you fucking idiot.  (It hurts, doesn’t it?)

jennifer hudson sassy dreamgirl effie

slampiece is not a girlfriend – Wise.  Fucking wise.

crazy horse fuckong lady

european motherfuckers – Couldn’t have said it better myself.

get your colonial shame off my breasts – I think I’ll just let this little gem stand on its own.

i am your beard

tyras fake hair – It’s called a weave, people. 

but thats crazy horse Ba-dum chiiiiiiii!!!!!!1

ann boleyn fellattio – I bet she gave great head. 

woman fuck with buffalo horn – That seems like a gynecological nightmare.

eric northman beard

i want read horse with girls sex story in hindi – Yeah? I want read you to reassess your life.

baroness gets her way with well hung black man and fucks him – Is this a movie?  Is it on Netflix?  When can I see it?

vagina whistler – Is this another movie title? Like The Horse Whisperer or something? I would pay to see that.

how to find girl for fuck in whistler

colonel sanders daughter pictures

her pubic hair did not fit she obtained an annulment Valid.

eric northman nazi –  Sacrilege. You shut your whore mouth.

wife fuck shame sharing be shame

eat suck from sexy ass – Help. Seek it.

fuck that crazy hore

tomboy is make males to crossdress? – Yes, my sweet, inquisitive friend. Yes it is.

she bang she rule – Little-known original chorus of Ricky Martin’s “She Bangs.”

don’t fuck with alaska – OMIGOD SARAH PALIN FOUND OUR BLOG!

i am his slam piece – A compliment of the highest order has been bestowed on you, yung frnd.

am i his slam piece – Hey, you can do anything you put your mind to.

i want read horse with girls sex story in hindi – You’d have come to the right place if we in fact wrote about any of those things.

what moustached, cane-toting silent film star was born on this day in 1889? –  Are we fucking AOL Answers? Read an effing book, or watch the Oscar-nominated 1992 biopic staring one Robert Downey Jr. for your goddamn answers.

gentleman woodcut 

‘striptease’ on train lapped up in china – ‘What?’

indian mothers and teenagers showing intimacy – Is anyone else alarmed by the frequency of search terms in this theme?

sodomy chains – It’s times like this when I really feel like we’re doing society a great service.

clubplatinumy sexy com – You guys………..did Tom Haverford find our blog?

my time my favor walt whitman email – …..my moment, my Dove?

my confessor fucks me – That’s not our problem. We’ve got bystanded syndrome. Blame it on society.

mega throatfuck complication – Yes, I can see how that could get mega-complicated.

imagine yourself as one of the figures in the battle depicted in the bayeux tapestry, in a letter home, describe the experience to your family. write a first person account of this historical event from the perspective of one of the figures in tapestry. – I can only assume this was a homework question, and I can only assume that you’re going to get an A-motherfucking-plus on it. You’re welcome.

gerbil manor – Gerbil lords, gerbil vassals, gerbil serfs. God I hope that’s what this person does for funsies.

swimfins project building for kindergarten – I’m so sorry that you ended up here.

what authors would you recommend on crown prince rudolph – MRG, obviously.

women, shit. willaim faulkner – Yes, damn. Right.

michael jackson dangerous aleister crowley

teresa giudice wikipedia – YES YES YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES.

Yours truly,

LHB, MRG, and JAF



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